Thought of the Day

“You see Bob, it's not that I'm lazy, it's that I just don't care.”
– Peter Gibbons (Ron Livingston), from the movie "Office Space"

That's a (Game 1) Winner!

The St. Louis Cardinals (Go Redbirds!) beat the San Diego Padres 8-5 to take game 1 of the National League Divisional Series.

Outfielder Reggie Sanders hit a grand slam (and set an NL division series record with six RBI) while Chris Carpenter pitched six scoreless innings and left with a nice padded lead of 8-0.

Well, those pesky Padres couldn’t be shaken. Besides scoring once in the seventh, they added another run in the eighth and then got right back into it in the ninth after Jason Isringhausen was brought in to end the game, but, things didn’t go according to plan as ‘Izzy’ made things interesting (interesting for Padres’ fans, absolute hell for us Cardinal fans) by allowing the Pad’s to cross the plate three times and load the bases with two outs before he struck out Ramon Hernandez to end the game.

(Sigh. I’m going to need a lot of alcohol to get through this series, I just know it.)

And here’s an interesting (to me at least) sidebar.

Usually, a couple of days before the series starts, the Mayor of each team’s city places a wager on their team winning the series, IE St Louis Mayor Francis Slay would make a ceremonial wager with his counterpart in the opposing team’s city (San Diego).

In last year’s NLDS against the Dodgers of Los Angeles (not to be confused by the Anaheim Angels of Los Angeles), Mayor Slay put up some Bissinger’s chocolate, toasted ravioli (a St Louis delicacy) and some cases of Budweiser against cobblers from a famous pie shop – the “Kobbler King” – offered up by then L.A. Mayor James K. Hahn.

So what would be the gamble with today’s opponent, San Diego? Some t-ravs for tasty California fish tacos? A case of Bud Select for a stuffed Zoo animal? Frozen custard for a copy of the Charger’s schedule?

Sounds like fun, except there’s one slight problem:

San Diego doesn’t have a mayor.

Apparently, there is some political turmoil in City Hall (much like the White House – but that’s an entry for my other blog site: (http://thebushwhackedleague.blogspot.com/)

In the wake of a pension fund investigation by the federal government, the sitting mayor left office with three years left on his term. So now, a surf-shop operator (and you thought Harriet Miers was unqualified for her nominated position) and a former police chief are now vying for the office that will be decided by a special election November 8th.

In the meantime, the city is being run by an acting mayor who apparently is not up for some friendly civic gambling. (Maybe he’s just hedging his bets, I mean, who would bet against the Cardinals anyway? – and of course as soon as I say that the Cards will lo—
…why do I open my mouth?)

Game 2 is Thursday (why a day off when there is no traveling? Who knows.) at 3:05 central with the Cardinals’ Mark Mulder facing off against the Padres’ Pedro Astacio. Again, I will be at work while the game is on and have no means of even listening to it. My computer does not have streaming capability (apparently that would cause the hamster on the wheel to get tired) so I will have to make do by having ESPN.com’s Gamecast on…gotta love technology.

Thought of the Day

"I have trouble living with myself, how could I live with anyone else?"

- Nipsey Russell, the "poet laureate of TV" who died Sunday, October 2nd

The Return of the King(s)…and the BLUES…and the Blackhawks…

It is back.

Yes, that’s right hockey is back. It’s back and I couldn’t be happier…(well, I could be, but the odds of President Bush taking the rest of his term off on sabbatical seems unlikely, but a man can dream, can’t he??? Heck, I’d like to see the President even spell the word sabbatical…)

After taking a season off, the NHL is about to conclude its first training camps in two years amid a variety of changes to the game and to its teams. As usual, there is good and bad (and even some ugly) to just about everything. Below are some of the changes and how I think they will affect the game.

(You’re asking yourself, what makes you an hockey expert? Well, I am an hockey expert. I’ve been watching hockey for 20 years…so I have to be an elder statesman when it comes to hockey fans, right?)

Good: Shootouts. Whether it's a good way to decide the outcome of games will be debated for years and years, but one thing is certain: The essence of the shootout--the breakaway--is the most exciting play in hockey and that is a good thing for the fans. (While living in Peoria I remember watching shootouts in minor league hockey – go Rivermen! – and always saying to myself – that’s what the NHL should do, go to a shootout system. It’s much more exciting than a tie. The NHL must have been listening to me…)

Bad: Disinterest. Will the fans come back? Hard-core fans and long-time fans will forgive and forget. Mid-level fans may come back in due time. New fans? That’s going to be the hard sell. How will teams get them back? The changes in the game are meant to open up the goal quotient, which the NHL believes will draw new people to the league. I have doubts that will work and that the league may have to go to more drastic measures (folding teams, cutting roster size, etc).

Good: The league appears serious about eliminating the clutching and grabbing, as well as the grabbing and clutching, that has plagued the sport for the last dozen or so years, reducing what should have been a fast-paced, high-energy game to an extended version of tug-of-war on ice. That should change now.

Bad: At least for the first couple of weeks, the players were having a hard time adjusting to the rules or they believe the game eventually will go back to the way it was. (That’s what happens when you don’t read the rulebook.)

Good: Referees will work games as a team and stay together for the whole season, giving NHL clubs an opportunity to keep a book on tandems and know night in and night out how a game will be officiated. (This one, I’m not so sure about.)

Bad: Referees still are without their names on their sweaters--depriving the paying public an opportunity to personalize their insults to the officials. (The minor league refs sport their name on the shirts, so it was nice to personalize an insult rather than just calling them near-sighted zebras)

Good: Led by Sidney Crosby, the crop of rookies poised to make its debut this season appears solid. (Unfortunately, my team has no such rookies, so it’s going to be a LONG season for Blues fans)

Bad: Camps were without some of the legends of the game--Mark Messier, Scott Stevens and Ron Francis, to name three. Time eventually claims everyone in sports, even the all-time greats.

Good: Wayne Gretzky, AKA The Great One and perhaps the greatest ambassador in the sport, is back involved on a day-to-day basis with the Phoenix Coyotes, but…Bad: Gretzky's involvement is not as a player but as a coach of a team that will struggle to break even on the ice.

Good: Accelerated free agency concept. After both sides signed the agreement, it was announced that almost all players would be entered into free agency at a discounted price (much like those $3 cassettes you can get at Wal-Mart). This allowed some teams who never got involved in free agency before to get involved for the purpose of evening out the playing field, so to speak. Will it work? I think so, but only time will truly tell.

Bad: Accelerated free agency concept. It cut some teams deep (like the St Louis Blues) and will (probably) cause those teams to be also-rans and miss the playoffs.

Good: The league eliminated the blue line AND icing. About friggin’ time. Talk about an inane and superfluous penalty. I’m a (fairly) smart person, but if anyone can explain an icing penalty to me so I can understand it…enter a comment and I’ll give a shout-out to you in a future blog.

Bad: Player’s names. Most players are from Canada, a few from the United States, and their names are easy to pronounce, like Sidney Crosby. But, with many players coming out of Eastern Europe (with names like Nikolai Khabibulin, Alexander Ovechkin, Kari Lehtonen and Mariusz Czerkawski) the league may have to release a name pronunciation guide.

Good: The NHL will begin a new national television deal with the Outdoor Life Network (OLN) this season. Unlike ESPN, where hockey was far down the importance scale (we HAVE to allow time for another Sportscenter, 12 a day just isn’t enough), the NHL will be treated with more respect, and may benefit from a larger marketing push…but...

Bad: Every sports fan knows what channel ESPN is on his cable system. Where's OLN? And do we have OLN?

Ugly: The black eye. And by that I mean the black eye the league has suffered due to this incredibly stupid act of striking. For the players to reject the final contract proposal from the owners only to, months later, accept a much worse offer shows just how idiotic some people can be. Will the league survive? Sure. Will some teams by forced to fold? Probably. How long will it take? Only time will tell.

The season starts Wednesday and it promises to be an exciting one, so, if you have never watched hockey before, I highly suggest you give it a try. When played properly it can be an exciting and fast-paced game, which it has not been in recent years. But, with the changes the league has made, it should revert back to its old self.

Now, if only we can get the fighting back…

Thought of the Day

"All you need in the world is love and laughter. That's all anybody needs. To have love in one hand and laughter in the other."

- August Wilson, esteemed and award winning playwright who died Sunday, Oct 2, 2005

Going...going...gone...

Sunday October 2, 2005, the St Louis Cardinals will play their final regular-season game at Busch Memorial Stadium…though, fittingly, they are in the playoffs this year, so Busch will be spared the wrecking ball for a few weeks (hopefully many more weeks - Go Redbirds!!).

Having been born (and for the first 11 years of my life) raised and still constantly visiting family and friends in the St Louis area, this day is an emotional one for me.

Because of this, I have decided that today's blog entry will be about Busch Stadium, and the memory(ies) of mind that stand out the most.

The Gateway Arch reaches into the St Louis skyline, easily visible above Busch Stadium. It stands there like, in the words of The Sporting News, “an ever-vigilant sentry guarding its St. Louis treasures. Jewels, past and present, like Bob Gibson, Lou Brock, Joe Torre, Ted Simmons, Bob Forsch, Ozzie Smith, Willie McGee, Mark McGwire and Albert Pujols. Diamond memories of Cardinals, Clydesdales, baseball magic and World Series moments, all colored in a sea of red.” (I couldn’t have said it any better myself)

Outside the stadium the bronze statues of Stan "The Man" Musial, Gibson, Brock, Enos Slaughter, Red Schoendienst and Jack Buck, strategically placed outside the stadium, sit ready to greet visitors and provoke inspiration. In recent years, the team has added smaller sculptures of other players, such as Dizzy Dean, Bob Gibson, and my favorite all-time Cardinal, Ozzie “Wizard of Oz” Smith.

From its 1966 opening through its impressive, and awe-inspiring facelift in the 90’s, Busch has carried the tag of a "cookie-cutter" stadium. It was the first of the sterile, boringly symmetrical, Astro-Turfed, multi-purpose facilities that sprang up in the late 1960s and '70s alongside Pittsburgh’s Three Rivers, Cincinnati’s Riverfront, and Philadelphia’s Veterans, along with many others.

The early Busch Stadium experience was Bob Gibson and Tim McCarver, Dal Maxvill, Joe Torre and Orlando Cepeda, Lou Brock and Vince Coleman, Ozzie Smith and Tommy Herr, Jack Clark and Keith Hernandez, Terry Pendleton and Al Simmons, George Hendrick and Willie McGee, John Tudor and Joaquin Andujar. It was waves of red, line drives into the gap, a man-eating automatic tarp, the Wizard of Oz, Whitey-Ball, Harry Caray, Jack Buck and Mike Shannon in the broadcast booth.

It was a massive two-sectioned scoreboard, one side occupied by an Anheuser-Busch eagle, the other by an electronic Redbird that flew back and forth during a seventh-inning stretch or in recognition of a Cardinals home run. It was team owner August A. Busch triumphantly circling the stadium in a beer wagon pulled by a team of Clydesdales, or an Ozzie Smith back flip.

It was beautiful.

There were no unusual angles, dimensions or nuances to spice up play. Dimensions were standard: 330 feet down both lines and 386 to the power alleys. Center field was 414 (later 404) and the AstroTurf, installed in 1970, was hard and fast.

Supporting the Cardinals meant appreciating the aggressiveness and fundamentals of the game, and, of course, the stolen base, which Brock and Coleman turned into lethal offensive weapons. The home run was a 70’s and 80’s afterthought. Whitey Herzog's 1982 world champions hit 67 homers (three fewer than Mark McGwire hit in his record-setting 1998 season) while recording 200 steals.

Further into the 90’s, new ownership, no longer content to let one of baseball's premier franchises play in a no-frills setting, retro-fitted Busch Stadium into one of the fan-friendliest playgrounds in the game.

The turf was replaced by grass. One area, decorated by flags, celebrated the retired numbers in Cardinals history. The bullpens were moved from the first and third base foul lines to areas behind the left and right field fences. And a more modern scoreboard in left-center was mirrored by a replay/highlights screen in right-center.

Any fan that had not been to a game since the 70’s might not have recognized the new Busch; sleek and modern the stadium became an attraction on its own merit. The house that a beer baron had built in 1966 was officially transformed into a warm, inviting for the best baseball fans in the world.

Trying to pick one favorite memory of Busch Stadium is hard. So I have picked two because, well, it’s my blog and I can do what I want. Also, because they are special to me for different reasons.

While I remember going to Cardinal games when I was younger (me dressed like a Cardinal geek – red shirts, red shorts, red hat, cardinal socks, cardinal sunglasses - I was a sight to see) with my parents and brother, or just my dad. The memories I remember most are much more recent.

Last season, 2004, the Cardinals made into the World Series for the first time since 1987 (a very long draught for a Cardinal fan, nothing of interest for a Cub fan). I was excited. My brother (who is not particularly a fan of sports) was excited. Our excitement grew larger when our Dad called and said our cousin has two tickets for Game 4 on Wednesday, October 27th and wanted to know if my brother and I wanted them.

I was dumbfounded. I couldn’t speak. I was speechless (that means the same thing I know, but stay with me here)

We jumped at the chance. So my memory is getting to the game very early, about 2 hours before game time. The plaza was jumping with a carnival-like atmosphere. Vendors selling food and beverages or novelties and souvenirs. Radio and TV stations handing out signs and rally flags.

It was incredible.

Then the game started. Our seats were in the last row of section xxxx. Literally, we could look behind us and see the city of St Louis. High up yes, but still with a great view of the field and the fans.

(The only negative thing about our seats was we were sitting next to two Red Sox fans. Now, I love sitting with Cub fans, whether it be Wrigley or Busch, because, while we may make fun of the other’s team, there was a mutual respect in there as well. Not so with these two schmucks. Think of the epitome of ego-filled baseball fans and you immediately conjure up images of Yankees fans. These two were like Yankees fans, rude, belligerent, loud, but were rooting for the Red Sox. Add to that that they used the overused and annoying phrase from Joe Buck’s commercial where he says” Slamma-lama-ding-dong.” Every other word out of their mouths was that phrase. By the 4th inning, my brother and I wanted to ‘Slamma-lama-ding-dong’ them back to Boston Harbor…but I digress.)

While the Cardinals suffered a rather impressive lack of hitting and pitching, just the fact that I was at a World Series game for the team I have followed for as long as I can remember, was incredible and etched in my mind forever.

The second moment was this past year when my wife and I, along with my brother and his girlfriend, took my twin daughters to their first Cardinal game. At the tender age of three, they behaved better than I could have possibly hoped. They sat on our laps and watched the game (who lost to the Atlanta Braves – notice a theme here? All of my Cardinal memories have the Cardinals losing the game in the background…) with an intensity and attention that is rarely seen in one three year old, let alone twin three year olds who always have a playmate with them wherever they go.

The fact I was there with my wife and children and my brother and (someday sister-in-law) his girlfriend, made the day that much better. To be able to have my daughters (who since they had been born had been having the phrase: ‘Go Cardinals!’ burned into their minds by myself) experience a game at Busch in the final season was a special thing for me. While they may not remember it all, I will.

And those are my two special memories. As I look back on my relationship with the stadium, I am filled with remorse, but also with hope that the new stadium will be as warm and inviting as the old one. And if it isn’t, it eventually will be.

Goodbye old friend…

Thought of the Day

“Más sabe el diablo por viejo que por diablo.”
Translation: "The devil is wiser because he is old, not because he is the devil."
- Old Spanish Proverb

Thought of the Day

“Midway upon the road of our life I found myself within a dark wood, for the right way had been missed.” – Dante Alighieri, from Inferno (AKA Dante's Inferno)

Applaud and Heckle

Applaud: to Conan O’Brien for this quote: "Yesterday President Bush made his fifth visit to the area that received the most damage from Hurricane Katrina. In other words, the White House." (From The Simpsons, to Late Night, to (in the future) The Tonight Show, his humor and wit has improved with each passing year. Makes me believe that he will be better than Leno (and Letterman) when he takes the reigns of the Tonight Show in a couple of years…)

Heckle: to former FEMA putz Michael Brown had his head handed to him today when he testified before a House committee on FEMA’s response, or lack thereof, to Hurricane Katrina. After that, ‘Brownie’ will accept a new job as (wait for it). . . as a consultant for FEMA. Nice. (Only in political circles can someone screw up something this major, then “resign”, and then be brought back as a consultant, all while making more money than before…gotta love it!)

Applaud: to two distinct individuals who each had an impact on other people’s lives:
- Dr. M. Scott Peck, noted author and self-help guru.
- Don Adams, who brought joy and laughter to adults in “Get Smart”, and then to children in “Inspector

Gadget”
Both died Sunday, and both will be missed…

Heckle: George W. Bush…again, like before, just on general principles alone…

Applaud: to quick thinking. Early Saturday morning, the owner of the Holiday Inn in Sulphur, Louisiana noticed that the hurricane-force winds had shifted and were threatening the, up to then unprotected windows in the back of the hotel. The owner quickly alerted the guests to put their mattress up against the windows in order to prevent them from shattering. Only 3 windows were lost and no one got hurt.

Heckle: to Askjeeves.com for dumping their genteel butler logo *and* their name. The company that runs the site stated that the slightly chubby and balding English butler isn't the kind of image that they want representing the search engine – so they are pushing him out – clearly a case of ageism. The company also announced that they are going to be changing the name (to ask or ask.com) as well. My thought: boycott them. Use Google, Yahoo, or Dogpile.com

Applaud: to Clarence Aguirre. One of the conjoined Filipino twins (who survived a long series of delicate surgeries to separate him from his brother) has begun walking. (Being a father of twins who missed being conjoined by, literally, a matter of minute, this makes me very happy and very proud for his parents) His brother is expecting to follow suit and take his first steps soon.

Heckle: to MLB’s Players Union. In an attempt to counter Commissioner Bud Selig’s offer of a “50-100-lifetime ban” penalty for testing positive for steroids, the union offered up a “20-75” penalty with provision after provision attached. The Union has got to get smarter in this area soon – the public is getting fed up with the abuse in the game, and every other professional sport (even surfing) has a real penalty system already in place. Take a cue from the NHL’s Players Union and take the offer. Otherwise, like the NHL Union, you could find yourself taking an offer that takes more away from the players than before.

Applaud: After viewing recent news accounts, we believe Bill Frist's political career is in a persistent vegetative state with little chance of recovery. Anyone know where we should send the flowers?

Heckle: to FEMA (shocked, shocked and appalled, aren’t ya?) The federal agency has turned down Wisconsin Governor Jim Doyle’s request for financial assistance to help his state recover from tornadoes that tore through the state last month. In a letter to Doyle, FEMA Acting Director R. David “Duck Tape” Paulison said the damage “…was not of such severity and magnitude as to be beyond the capabilities of the state and affected local governments.” (Mind-boggling, isn’t it?)

Applaud: to China for releasing in a statement that they will start to use satellite technology in order to look in on the sexual antics of Panda Bears….(you can NOT make this kind of stuff up.)

Heckle: to “Brownie” once again. Why? Why not?

Applaud: to FLOTUS, Laura Bush, for giving the Bob Barker treatment to our Puppet-in-Chief. According to the Washington Post, Laura Bush is telling George to be a little more Metrosexual by laying off the “swagger”. Steve Soto has the smackdown:

And now it's happened. It must be fun around the house now, with a top Republican saying openly that Laura's got Bush's balls in her pocket. If Skippy wasn't drinking before, he is now.

Thought of the Day x 2

Two quotes today, from two disparate individuals, each of them touched people in vastly different ways...

"One extends one's limits only by exceeding them."
- M. Scott Peck, author - passed away Sunday, Sept. 25, 2005

"I may never get to play with the Philharmonic, but on the other hand, is Leonard Bernstein licensed to kill?"
- Don Adams as Maxwell Smart, Agent 86 - passed away Sunday, Sept. 25, 2005

A Parting of Wisdom to all the Married Men Out There

My Advice for Married Men

Well, it's taken years of research on my part, but I've discovered something that could revolutionize how we look at the relationship between husband and wife. Take a seat this is some heavy stuff. My research has left me with the only conclusion that seems to fit. And that conclusion is:

Men and Women think differently.

I’ll give you a moment to let that sink in.

Imagine the marriages that could have been saved if this information had been available even a few short years ago! (I was lucky, I learned this fact very early in my life…early enough that I was able to use it to my advantage while in college)

It's almost as if women are from Venus and men are from ....some other, far-away, place…like New Jersey.

That's it, it's like women are an alien life form!

Just when I had finally gotten to the place in my life where I had rid myself of all emotions that seem to interfere with making intelligent, logical decisions, I figure out that most women actually value these types of feelings. And worse yet, they seem to want to talk about them.

Are they crazy??

But, loving my wife, I decided that if talking about how we felt was important to her, then that is what I will do.
Apparently though, it takes a little practice to get it right. My first attempt was after a particularly sad movie that my girlfriend, who is now my wife, had rented and we watched together. This move was just chocked full of lost loves, children orphaned, and dreams shattered. When the movie was finally over (luckily in time to catch the end of a rerun of The Simpsons) my girlfriend/now wife tearfully turned to me and asked me how it had made me feel.

Now, being a little new to this whole ‘feelings discussion thing’ concept but still trying my best, I answered, “hungry.”

The look on her face was like a loud 'incorrect answer' buzzer on a TV game show.

“Sorry Kemp, that was the wrong answer! You now have to go back to the beginning of the game and start all over, losing any points you may have accumulated up to now…”

For this reason, I have prepared a list of words that seem to work as acceptable answers, and some you would do well to avoid when talking to the love of your life:

- Amorous (full of love) not, and I can’t stress this one enough, not horny.

- Depleted (worn out from all the emotions swirling around my head), not brain-dead.

- Devastated (just imagine your team getting swept in four games in their first World Series since
1997 by a team that had not won it in 50 +years and sitting by two of the latter’s fans in the
deciding game four – damn Red Sox)

- Livid (very angry), not pissed off

- Effervescent (got this one from an old 7-Up commercial. I don't know what it means, but it seems to work when I don't know what else to say)

Humor is another thing that can get a man in trouble. Women do love humor, it's what alot of women actually look for first in a mate, at least that is what I was always told, but I am still a little skeptical.

The key to humor is to remember that it must be used correctly and at the proper time.

Why do men not make dead people jokes at funerals? I can tell you that it's not because they don't want to. It's because there are women around. If ever there was a funeral where there were only men in attendance, the dearly departed would have a mustache and beard magic-markered onto their face in short order. This is not out of disrespect either; it's just one way of dealing with the 'sense of loss' (which you may want to ad to the above list)

Men even joke in the midst of conflict. A friend of mine once told me about the time, after an especially emotional disagreement between him and his wife, that he thought he could apologize and lighten the mood at the same time by purchasing her a dozen roses and a card that said, “I'm sorry that you were wrong” Wow! Bit of advice, don't ever try that one guys – talk about failing miserably on both the apology and the humor front! (See, if he would have asked me about that, I would have told him only to do that if he wanted to sleep in the garage for the next month)

One last thing husbands, be prepared to hear this from your wife at some point: “I feel like crying and I don't know why.”

Try your best to hide the shock and horror that you will feel about this obviously alien statement, and trust me, don't offer to call an ambulance. Your wife is just telling you, in Venus language, that she wants comfort and an ear to bend.

And no, the comfort should not lead to "anything else…

Thought of the Day

“I have a theory that the truth is never told during the nine-to-five hours.”
- Hunter S. Thompson

Hallelujah!

No long, drawn-out, hilarious entry today.

Why?

Let me first avow myself about what I am going to say by stating this: I love my children and my wife very, very much. More than anything else in the world...hell, the universe.

That having been said...

Why am I excited?

Because my wife and daughters have a wedding shower to go to...and that means...

Sorry, I'm giddy with excitement...

That means...

Oh, I can't say it, I'm just to darned excited...

(Breathes out)

That means that I get an afternoon totally by myself.

No chores (they're all done), no work, nothing.

Just me, a nice salami sandwhich, a football game...and total...

complete...

unadulterated...

silence.

Enjoy your Sunday, I'll be funny again tomorrow.

The Older you Get...yada, yada, yada

When I was a young lad (yes, a young lad back in the home country of Ireland – and by Ireland I of course mean St. Louis) I remember wondering how anyone could watch something as torturously dull and boring as the news. It was painful, especially knowing that Fraggle Rock was just one little channel click away (yeah, I said Fraggle Rock – so what…)

I said to myself I'll never watch the news as long as I live.

Sigh. I must be getting old now. I watch the news constantly. News and weather with a good dollop of sports and politics thrown in for good measure.

What's really sad is that I can watch it for hours and hours, turn it off, then turn it back on again ten minutes later.I watch the Weather Channel constantly. It's just not good enough to get the forecast for my town (I think my current record is having watched forty seven "local on the eights" in a row) and then change to something else…no. I have to get the weather for all 50 states, the District of Columbia, Europe, the Middle East and Asia. I mean, what if weather develops while we’re watching The Apprentice? (Wait a minute, that’s not right, I don’t watch realty TV. Let’s alter that to…) while we’re watching Scrubs?

For news I have CNN and their jolly band of newsies like Soledad O’Brian, Jack Cafferty, Wolf Blitzer, et al. On MSNBC there’s Keith Olberman, Lester Holt (whom I remember from when he was a struggling anchor in Chicago) On Fox Ne—, wait a minute, sorry, my TV doesn’t go that far to the right.

I have favorite news channel and weather channel personalities, that’s a little pathetic right?

Don’t’ get me wrong, when I say I like watching the news, the weather, politics, and sports (though the ESPN schitck is getting very very old -- I mean, how mind-boggingly annoying does Chris Berman have to get before someone fires his 'arse') I don’t mean I do not watch anything else, I do watch comedies and dramas, and the annoyingly titled, dramedies. But, if I had my pick, I would watch the news.

That’s a sure sign of getting old, right? I mean…never mind. I guess I’m going to have to resolve myself to the fact that I am getting older and that my tastes are changing and maturing so I am watching shows aimed at an older demographic.

I wonder…is Murder She Wrote still on the air?

Thought of the Day

Bartlet: If anything happens... You got a best friend?
Tribbey: Yes, sir.
Bartlet: Is he smarter than you?
Tribbey: Yes sir.
Bartlet: Would you trust him with your life?
Tribbey: Yes sir.
Bartlet: That's your Chief of Staff.
- from The West Wing

A Word to the Wise...

Spread the word, there’s a new sheriff in town. In the never-ending attempt to create thought in today’s society (a rare and, unfortunately, sometimes misunderstood concept), my friend Scott and I have decided to launch another blog.

This one, of which we will be the prominent posters & writers, will have one subject. One topic that can bring people together…or tear them apart.

It will only be about politics.

Yes, you read that right: politics.

No family posts.

No entertainment posts.

No pop culture posts.

No coffee pos— (wait a minute, that one we may have to think about a little more)

Our other blogs will be for that (those links by the way are http://scottsrantspot.blogspot.com/ & http://blogofkemp.blogspot.com/)

This one will only be about politics.

All day – all night – 24/7

We will have occasional guest posters, some of whom may even be less Liberal…or worse yet, Conservative Republicans. (I know what some of you are saying, but, let’s practice some tolerance for those who disagree with us – are you listening Bush administration??)

You never know what can happen in the world of blogging.

So, if you are into politics, and I know many of you are, take a gander, I think you’ll be pleasantly surprised.

Here’s the link: http://thebushwhackedleague.blogspot.com/

What’s that link? It’s http://thebushwhackedleague.blogspot.com/

In case you missed it, that link is http://thebushwhackedleague.blogspot.com/

Have a read.

Thought of the Day

"A leader leads by example not by Force."
- Sun Tzu, from The Art of War

The Portal of Serenity

Remember before you had kids, or maybe just shortly after you had kids? (I do, although at times I seem to embellish some of the facts about that -- as does my wife. Just ask her...on second thought, don't.)

Remember those delusions of grandeur you always had about being a parent?

How about the statements you made to anyone that would listen? (Mind you I never said anything like this)

Statements like: “My child will never act like that!” or “My child will be getting all 'A's in school” or “My child will always listen to what I say or ask.”

(How’s that working out for ya? Going well, right? I’m sure it is – going as well as Puppet-in-Chiefs current approval ratings I bet…)

Another favorite that was thrown out there – ”My child will not sit in front of that television all day.”

Before you had kids, you would see other people’s children sitting there in front of the tv, and, you swear you could actually hear them getting dumber with each minute they watched another episode of Teletubbies. You told yourself, ‘There was no way your children were going to fall into that trap.’Oh thee, of little faith. Apparently these parents had the right idea all along. The television is by far the most effective babysitter in all creation.

Who knew?

Submitted for your approval, twin girls, three years old, their mother out of town. They are fighting, screaming, biting and destroying for hours and hours without end until you've pulled out the last of your hair, developed a twitch or worse yet, started writing a blog.

Now imagine pushing a button, and these same little monsters freeze where they are, their mouths still gaping from being cut off mid-scream. Slowly they drop to the floor where they remain motionless for as long as the portal of calm glows its effervescent hue.

And when I say motionless, I mean motionless, like a statue. I usually have to put little bowls on there laps to catch the line of drool falling from their open mouths.
It's perfect. Almost too perfect.

The high parenting standards quickly go out the window. You try to soothe your conscience by editing their viewing content, only allowing them to watch shows that are kid-friendly like The Wiggles, Barney or The Doodlebops (which, by the way, are NOT parent-friendly – if anything, these shows can have the effect on parents that showing your little ones “Night of the Living Dead” could have on them)

Deep down though, you know that you would let them watch “Animal House” if it was the only thing on. Trying to battle your conscience by saying: “It has singing in it, they love music!”

(While I was a Stay at Home Dad (SAHD), and if the girls were playing quietly, I would put one of the seasons of The West Wing into the DVD player. When my girls heard the opening montage music, they rushed into the room and would sit down quietly next to me and watch.)

You have failed. You are now one of 'those' parents.

But hey, at the very least you've failed peacefully.

Thought of the Day

"The mass of men lead lives of quiet desperation."
- Henry David Thoreau, from Walden

Thought of the Day

“Ah, women. They make the highs higher and the lows more frequent.”
- Friedrich Nietzsche